Looking back 18 months ago

Well to say things have been life changing is an understatement....

Life being the ultimate  word  or the lack of it
No less than 5 people who I knew very well.... one in particular being a very dear and beautiful frend....to say I was heart broken was an understatement, and the world is surely a poorer place without her....

Others were indeed tragic especially for those left behind...
And all were comparatively in their prime....some not even 50 years old.

How life changes.....

I chanced upon some diary entries from about 18 months ago....which would of been just after I started my new job!!
To say I was stressed, was an understatement , seemed like I was nearly over the edge....
Nervous, uncomfortable, unfamiliar, scared of making mistakes, drained,stressed,tired, just some of the words I used to describe how I was feeling.
No way did I think I would last 18 days never mind 18 months.
but true to the stubborn soul that I am...I dug my heels in and put up with a lot of s**t
And there's more...about my job to tell soon
But surprise surprise 18 months on and I'm still in the same job...how long for only God knows....
But what I do know is if I can do it, any one can....
What a difference 18 months can make......
And as they say as one door opens...so do a few more ( well thats not exactly how the saying goes )

a kind deed can be beautiful for the giver as well as the receiver


I'm guessing we all have bad days.... bad weeks....bad months and sometimes these bad times can last a whole lot longer....and i certainly know how it feels when someone does something kind, unexpected, out of the blue that makes you smile.....
Even if its just for a short while... to feel like you are not alone and that someone actually cares.....wow how amazing
And whats even more amazing is that for that person who is being kind the feeling is equally amazing..the feeling of being responsible for making another human being smile, or feel less wretched is awesome.... 

So if we all take the opportunity to be kinder to others than is actually necessary .... even if all we can do is smile or offer a few kind words...or even just listen... then possibly we can all feel a little more awesome

Be awesome today

Am I ever going to get this paperwork done today

If I've tried once I've tried a dozen times to get this paperwork done....

So 4hrs later and it's finally done....Oh my days

The phones never stopped ringing....and people been in and out its like piccadilly circus....

Lunch time ...thank the Lord

Chasing my tail today

And as we all know I am just gonna get further and further behind.....

And everything is gonna take longer.... 

So why I think I have got time to sit and eat my breakfast in peace.... God only knows

So now I'm going to be late for work !!!!

Wish me luck today cuz I'm gonna need it

And today is another day

The sun has got her hat on.... 


Well not exactly

But there has definitly been some chinks of blue sky in that thunderous sky of yesterweek!!!!

yep its all about those lovly patients of mine....gotta love the old folk....they have so much to share...so many stories to tell


And there's more...  but thats for another day   




And it shows you continually...that there is always someone worse off than yeself ...

Amazing thing is they usually just get on with it...

A lesson in there for me I think.....(but we all know it aint that easy when that red mist settles )  

  God bless em

Life is full of ups and downs....

And that just my moods.....

Most days I am full of the joys of spring... I try to be positive and I give out loads of similar advice !!!

Let things go over your head
Dont sorround yeself with negative people/situations
Look for the positive in every situation
You will find the good if you look for it
look at your blessings...not just at every one elses.......

But as a woman every now and then it arrives....like thunder...like a black cloud...yes i'm sure your all familiar with it.....the red mist...

well its one of those days or should I say one of those weeks, all of the above in reverse...negative thoughts..nothing going over my head....taking everything personally...AND THEN SOME !!!

God help me cus at this rate I'm gonna have no job..no frends...and no family!!!!

And you would think at 50 something I would be well rid of the dreaded demon

And the strangest thing is ...you know and I know that nothing is any different to what it was last week !!!!

All prayers greatfully accepted

 

sundays can be strange

if you are anything like me, you probably wait all week for Sunday to come around...not that I particularly like Sundays....its a strange kind of a day...time drags for most of it..then you blink and its gone...a meal takes all day to do on a Sunday ???  

so its the day I plan to get all those long awaited chores done... 

beds changed... cupboards tidied.... cooked breakfast... ready myself for Monday

pfttttt    and just like all bad plans....it rarely happens   especially during the winter months
( to be fair, nothing gets done in the spring /summer months because I just love being outdoors ) 

sure I get some things done...but I invariably feel down because I'm stuck indoors...my mood gets grey like the weather and I get annoyed with myself because I didn't plan something more exciting to do...
and yes Monday is looming and the week starts all over again!!!!!

so nothing else to do but plan what i will do next Sunday...and I will definitely plan something more interesting?????   
 ha ha.... I tell myself ......