Survived the works do !!!

So its the day after the night before....
A great night was had by all...sadly it will take a while for some people to remember.....chances are, some people may not want to remember......  

 Paracetamol by the shed load ....

  

the shapes people were pulling...

why the hell does every one all of a sudden fall in love with you, they havnt seen you since last years xmas party, and thats just the women.....WTF is that all about...

  

Famous last words.....

''I'm not getting drunk this year''........

Wot eva......

Thankfully i saw the results before it was too late....lol...not a pretty sight...

just one or two glasses of chardonnay will suffice!!!!

cant cope with the embarassment or the head ache !!!!

Nuf Sed

Works Do...( or Xmas Party to me n you )

So its the once a year Xmas bash.....                     Put on by the company that i do some work for......
The ladies in their new frocks and matching accesories  

and the men in their best bib n tucker  
An opportunity for the usually proffesional stiff up lipped men and women to gt absolutely legless and make complete and utter  of theirselves....to drink that much that they cant speak......Why you ask yourselves......

Because its free and they havnt had to pay for it!!!!!!!!
As good a reason as any i hear you say...

 a night that starts like this ....

and ends like this !!!!!

 

or this....

or this....lmao

So outfit all sorted....hair all dun....

Time to go and have some fun.....

Hopefully i will only have 1 or 2...( glasses not bottles ) 

Dont want to loose my bag or my shoe!!!  

Instead I'll just sit and and photograph my colleagues

As they knock back the drinks and sink to their knees

I know i wont have long to wait

A free drink is like fish to the bait

I hope u've enjoyed my short little rhyme

must hurry along its party time.....

Black Country ? where's that ? revisited !!!

So here goes...i will try to make this clearer...

I hope yow've enjoyed the alphabet rhyme,                 you've

Yow better 'ad done, it took a long time.                      you better have done

About our spakin' they say it sounds queer,                 speaking

We cor help the way we say it raand ere.                     cant.......round here

If yow cud 'elp me wi' sum werds that am new,            you could help me with some words

Ar maaght just rite the alphabet t'you.                            I might 

If yow cor, dow get in a tizzy,                                          you cant, dont get in a flap

I know sum on yow folk am sometimes quite bizzy,        you folk..........busy

Cuz eny rode up, if yow elp me or not,                            because either way......you help

I'll get on wi' me writin and say thatz ya lot.                     with ......thats

Naar that yav errd me aphabet rhyme,                            Now that you've heard

I'd like to thank ya for tekkin the time,                              you for taking

Cuz it aye very aisy this poetry writin,                              Because it isnt very easy

I 'ope that sum on ya find it excitin.                                   I hope that some of you

I'm glad that yo've erred it, but I dow know abaat yow,  you've heard it..dont know about you

Arr think arm' quite cleva, az me poem ull show.           I think I'm ..as my poem will

Rememba last time when yow saw us last,                    you

Ya know, me, them, un the rest of us cast,                    you know, me, them,and the rest

We asked ya to find sum werds that wuz new                you to find some words that were

So arr cud write me poem part two.                                 I could

Arr bet yo've forgot, un I asked ya sa nice,                   I bet you've forgot, and I asked you so

It looks as if arr shud av asked twice.                           I should of

It's a good job I'm plassid and dow tek afence             placid and dont take offence

But to ask yow poor lot, shud av ad moor sense.         you....should of had more

Now if yarall nice and comfy, settled un that,                you are all......and

I'll start recitation or else ate me 'at,                              eat my hat

Naa cum on, be quiet, tek in and yow lern,   Now come on, be quiet, take it in and you'l learn

Yow dow know it yet, but ar'm the star tern.    You dont....BUT I'M THE STAR TURN

Ope yow all enjoyed it......xx

Black Country ? where's that ?

Yow Dow Talk Propa.....

I live in an area that just borders the 'Black Country'.  ''Where'' I hear you say...
Its kind of in central England...no one really knows where it is....but on a map , if you find Cradley, Blackheath, Dudley, Bilston you will be kind of in the right area!!!!  ( may be ) ( a lot of folk will say thats not a true image of the Black Country....but hey who knows)

An area renown for industry, glassmaking, mining, canals to name but a few.....and even has its own castle....in which i've spent many a happy day with my family

 

                    

One things for sure they talk very odd....ive lived round her all my life, i understand it, but dont talk it...

One of the local ladies wrote this.....have a go.....

Doreen went on (poetically)...

I hope yow've enjoyed the alphabet rhyme,

Yow better 'ad done, it took a long time.

About our spakin' they say it sounds queer,

We cor help the way we say it raand ere.

If yow cud 'elp me wi' sum werds that am new,

Ar maaght just rite the alphabet t'you.

If yow cor, dow get in a tizzy,

I know sum on yow folk am sometimes quite bizzy,

Cuz eny rode up, if yow elp me or not,

I'll get on wi' me writin and say thatz ya lot.

Naar that yav errd me aphabet rhyme,

I'd like to thank ya for tekkin the time,

Cuz it aye very aisy this poetry writin,

I 'ope that sum on ya find it excitin.

I'm glad that yo've erred it, but I dow know abaat yow,

Arr think arm' quite cleva, az me poem ull show.

Rememba last time when yow saw us last,

Ya know, me, them, un the rest of us cast,

We asked ya to find sum werds that wuz new

So arr cud write me poem part two.

Arr bet yo've forgot, un I asked ya sa nice,

It looks as if arr shud av asked twice.

It's a good job I'm plassid and dow tek afence

But to ask yow poor lot, shud av ad moor sense.

Now if yarall nice and comfy, settled un that,

I'll start recitation or else ate me 'at,

Naa cum on, be quiet, tek in and yow lern,

Yow dow know it yet, but ar'm the star tern.

more to follow tomorrow........

Tuesday Brunch

Nice to av a catch up.....

        
ha ha may b 40 years ago!      may b 25 years ago ??    oh yes there we r !!!  lol  I wish )
                                

Oh No......LMAO.......there we are !!!!!!

So I had a lovly lunch with my frend.....Its been about 4/5 weeks  ( i think )    Senior moment......

I cannot see,I can not pee.

I cannot chew, most days, I havnt a clue

My memory shrinks.my hearing stinks.

No sense of smell,I look like hell.

The golden years are here at last.

The golden years can kiss my ass.

Mine was mostly Liquid.....i blame it on the lack of teeth....( or on my frend !! )

We chatted for hours and gave our jaws a good old work out...     For a change !!!!!

And what seemed like only minutes, had turned out to be 3 or 4 hours and it was time to get back to reality.

                       

And a mug of strong coffee......

And of course then i'll need another  and this ones a bit ike me....yep u guessed it ...a bit wrinkleeeeeee.....

The Good Samaritan

My eldest son is a good sort and if he coudnt do you a good turn, he definitly wouldnt do you a bad one.
He looks quite scary cus hes about 6 foot n probably as wide across!!  (slight exageration) but a good hearted fella n i'm proud to say hes mine,

So he just hapens to be at ours one late afternoon, and its dropping dark.  A couple of his friends call in on him while hes here and they are having a chat on the drive. U get the picture

We live in an area where its mainly old people who have lived here for 25 years ( since the houses were built ) so when we arrived they were very suspicious and very unfriendly to say the least. Sure we dont hale from the typical background that people from this area were familiar with...but hey....who's perfect.
Three years on and most of em are kinda ok with us...wave to us...smile...that knd of thing....( still secretly waiting for us to F*** Up.....)

         

what is going on and what people assume is going on !!!!!

That was about to get worse!!!!

My sons friends wre just about to leave and one of the houses electric went off....( coincidence i hear you say....) alarm was goin off and allsorts!!!

My neighbours had already got my son tried and hung....

He came out of his house......

''what have you done to my electric? its gone off, what are you doing''

''I ent touched ye electric'' my son replied .laughing.....''let me av a look at it''

So he proceeded to follow the old guy into the house and was met by the old woman

 who pointed him to the fuse box..''its under the stairs''

So mean time the whole of the cul de sac were now out.....imagine what was going through their heads when they came intto the old couples house and saw my lasd under the stairs!!!!!

''What u up to under there son''

''Changin a fuse eh ???  or robbin the joint ''

Luckily my son saw the  funny side of it.....

The old folk explained to their friends that he was sortin out the electric!!!!!

They were very grateful and asked him what they owed him....

He obviously said he would cum back later and help his self !!!!!!!!!